As we got ready, my friend questioned my choice of wearing boots with a sundress as a little too casual. Turns out, most of the guests were in Xtra Tuffs and raingear. The dogs usually wear flower leis, which make them fit in stylishly. Many of the guys wore guns. This is strange mainly because none of those guys wear guns at any other times. Nor do they even use guns as far as I know. But, for a dress-up event, when most men are finding that suit at the back of their closet and ironing (or just using the tumble cycle on the dryer), Alaskan men are dusting off their gun belts. Also worth noting is that everyone in Alaska can officiate a wedding once, so rarely are people married by preachers or judges when a friend will do. Traditional wedding vows must have been lost on the way through Canada, because everyone here writes their own vows, most of them have some poetic allusion to nature. No one mentions the guns.
Outside of wedding circles, I have been talking guns lately. A few weeks ago, I decided that I would like to learn how to hunt. I work in remote areas where I could see this becoming a useful skill. I also am an omnivore who thinks that if you are going to eat meat, you should be able to kill it. Beef and other commercially produced meats are very expensive and fairly poor quality in Alaska, not to mention the 'carbon footprint' of getting it here and the chemicals used in mass meat production and distribution. Add to that that a hunting trip would be a good wilderness experience, and I just needed to find a willing teacher. Luckily, I hold the trump card to convince an outdoors man to ruin his fall hunting trip with an inexperienced girl: a float plane.
My coerced guide and tolerant friend Jedd made sure that I was outfitted with the right rifles (a .30-06 and a .338, we'll see which one works best) and hearing protection for target practice. He recommends I use a .338, but I'm Annie Oakley with the .30-06... not so much with the bigger weapon. Two weeks to go...we'll see.
This isn't my first rodeo as far as guns are concerned. My dad insisted that we take a gun safety course as kids. I don't remember much from that besides that the girl who sat next to me wanted to change her name to "Crystal Blue Persuasion" and the instructor only had stubs for fingers... but could still pull a trigger. Luckily, the Army brushed me up on the M16 in college, but that was the last time I shot a rifle: more than 10 years ago, and just using the post sights on the barrel. Turns out, hunting rifles have a lot more kick, but really fancy scopes. If you can hold marginally still while looking through the scope and pulling the trigger, you will hit what you're aiming at.
I'm not thrilled about attempting to murder an animal, but I am excited for the experience of this hunt and have been talking about it to anyone who cares to hear. Surprisingly, hunting talk is not always well-received, even in Alaska. The other day, at a remote lodge, I announced I was going on my first moose hunt, expecting to be as lauded as a toddler's first trundling steps. Wrong. Another Alaskan pilot and two German lodge patrons read me the riot act and accused me of being a trophy hunter: something that would be funny to anyone who knows about my deep seeded fear of taxidermy. My list of reasons for wanting to learn to hunt certainly sounds a lot more "eco-friendly" than buying all-organic foods shipped in from Denmark... what's more organic than hunting and gathering? None of my critics claimed to be vegetarians, but one of them justified himself by saying that he doesn't eat animals with fur. Apparently my willingness to shoot Bullwinkle is morally abhorrent, but God condones carving up Big Bird or Nemo. So, I need to re-sight my scope, and my moral compass, but then, what do you expect from a girl who wears boots to a summer wedding?
1 comment:
I sincerely hope the next time we see you, you will bring us some homemade moose jerky! Ask that guy that doesn't eat meat from animals with fur how that wrinkly furless cat tastes.
Post a Comment